Here's how it works...

I'm not a scientist or a nutritionist (the world of science thanks me for that) but I figure one of our biggest food issues, is not what we eat, but how much we eat.   Food today is probably packed out with loads of addictive rubbish, but it is still possible to have 'a little of what you fancy'.  It's a question of how much.

For me, I have good days and bad days.  A good day means sticking (to the letter) to a set amount of calories. So come supper time, even if I wasn't hungry, I'd be fishing about for stuff to nibble on, so I could polish off my 'calorie allowance' for the day.

A bad day on the other hand, meant letting it all hang on, usually eating very little by day and then having a bottle of Prosecco for dinner with a nice carb-heavy meal...think Pasta, cream, cheese or fajitas.  Oh how I looooovveee fajitas.   The result of that though is a heavy 'food hangover' the next day - feeling disgusting, bloated and guilty.  

I would wake up in the morning, feeling lethargic and unhappy with myself. The 'action' of those feelings is to then wear black and to 'hide' my body.

Much of this stream of thought is unconscious - but people always comment when I've lost weight, more so because they notice I'm wearing brighter clothes.

So this experiment is to become more aware of what I'm shovelling in my mouth and more aware of my thought processes.  

After yesterday's sort of blue day, an arrow shot through my head, 'go home, eat, relax'.  But how would that make stuff any better?  Having a plate of creamy carbs isn't going to fix the problems I'm facing...though it'd probably provide a temporary escape.  

Funny how my brain has become wired in this way.   This is what I'm trying to smash.  It's a starve-binge cycle that's messed up and which fixes nada.

Day 3 begins...